One of my friends is going out toinight to get drunk because she feels like it.
It makes me sad and all that jazz.
But sometimes, I want to say "fuck it" and party all night long and scream and shout and dance on tables and I want STROBE LIGHTS and to jump into a pool of boys and girls who will pass me along to the music. I want blaring music and bright lights and I want to sweat off all my worries. I want to get CRAZY, get WILD, do something absolutely exciting.
I want to do something so out-of-character with my always-worried self.
I don't want drugs, no. I don't want to get drunk.
I just want to completely let loose and go nuts. and tonight's prom. I truly am a party girl, really, just not the drunk slut party girl. I'm the sober, hyperactive wild party girl who can turn things into a great time but I don't have any chances for it.
And as much as I hate people my age, sometimes I want to get in a medium-sized room and be right in the center, dancing and jumping and freeing myself to the pulsating music. I want to have that guy I can wink at, I want to have that boy who will try to kiss me and I want to dance and flirt and be happy and wild. I want to dance until I DROP. LITERALLY.

I want what I can't get.
For some reason, it just isn't here...