Even when I was little.

Even when I was little I always had this sense that I loved everyone around me way more than they loved me, not including my family.

I used to lay in my bed at night, and would look at my hands, and hold them, pretending it was someone else.

I used to, and still do, create conversations in my head that will never happen.

But even when I was little I always felt like I was on the fringes of everything, away in my own little world.

My scars are fading but I feel more cut than ever.

Well, no, not necessarily FEEL more cut than ever.

But in my mind's eye, if everything on the inside showed on the outside, there would be crisscrosses everywhere, and old wounds and new wounds covering almost every surface of my skin...